Racism Is Always There, Whether You Can See it or Not

I was fortunate to be raised by my parents and many other authority figures in my early life to not be racist and hateful. I look at positive experiences in my childhood and at what a contrast they are to how some people choose to behave today and I am incredulous at the depravity happening in how we treat each other.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today…the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

– Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I grew up in a “melting pot” that included individuals from a lot of different backgrounds. I did not define someone in a negative way because of their skin color or nationality. I would remember that this classmate was from Cuba or that student was from Sri Lanka and I enjoyed meeting people from around the world. When all I knew was where someone was born, then that would be the first fact I filed away, but as I got to know them better we were just friends who had common interests, shared the same sense of humor about what made us laugh, had common ups and downs with our siblings, and dreamed diverse dreams that were united in the commonality that we all wanted to go far. My priority was to spend time with friends of good character who wanted to have fun. A diverse group of friends fit these goals. 

I’m not concerned with your liking or disliking me. All I ask is that you respect me as a human being.

– Jackie Robinson

I started school with a Kindergarten teacher who was black. She was a wonderful first impression of school. At first I cried every day because going to school meant missing the end of Sesame Street, but I soon learned that the plans she had for us were going to be a new kind of fun. My teacher a few years later was not a “Black teacher” to me, she was simply one of my Favorite teachers. She was a woman of character who treated us with kindness and respect and would listen to us tell her of all the exciting things we were doing for the first time in our little lives. She had a boyfriend who would often send flowers to our classroom and I just loved witnessing her light up and smile and enjoy his displays of affection. I so wanted that to happen to me when I grew up! From my innocent perspective, I did not ride bikes or play games or do homework together with “Black Friends”. I enjoyed common interests with Friends.

One of my friends in particular was exceptional. As a child, I thought that was just part of his nature. He made excelling at everything across the board as a human being look so easy and fun. He taught me some Ebonics, let me know that my sneakers were bobos, and warned my friends and I not to eat the government cheese. He achieved some of the best grades in the class, could make anyone laugh no matter how bad their day was, and had a sense of style that made every moment a party. He transcended any cliques we had and as a class we were all united in our high esteem of him.

However, it was recently pointed out to me that his exemplary qualities were most likely a response to the pressure to excel in an environment where he was a minority. While our school had a level of diversity, he was only the second black student in our accelerated learning class where we basically had the same group of students in the class every school year. As a child, I thought the pressure to achieve was relatively equal just because we were in such a class, but as an adult I understand that he certainly must have felt that pressure even more so.

We also had a teacher one year who, in my opinion, gave students a hard time that she perceived to be easy targets. It was my observation that if someone was quiet or had family troubles or in the case of the other black student, their right answers were overlooked and marked wrong, she would “forget” to turn the test paper over to look at what was written on the back, their clothes would be ridiculed in front of the class, they would be asked hard questions during class discussions instead of easier ones that her favorites got, and a variety of other behaviors that those on her list dreaded. What an incredible amount of hateful and irrational pressure to put on such young children! I think this student’s sharp instincts and exceptional social skills were a survival skill he developed to navigate her and others full of hatred, skills that must have been developed at an even earlier age as a black child.

Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars, to change the world.

– Harriet Tubman

So many civil rights heroes paid such a high price to knit us all together better in peace. We each have the opportunity to carry on their legacies in our own lives. This is not a burden; it is an opportunity! We don’t have to carry on their good works; we get to carry on their good works.

Even when we do not engage in racist behaviors, we need to remember that POC face racism every day, whether we can “observe” it or not. You’ve got this!

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